Friday, November 25, 2005

ALLOWANCES

I have three girls, and two of them have chores around the house that they share. I have them taking out the trash, feeding the dog and fish, cleaning the dinner table and cleaning up the poop in the yard. Now my nine year old feels as if she should be paid for this task! She wants a weekly allowance for her the 'labor' that she does around the house. I'm against that concept. I'm against handing out allowances based on whether or not they've done their chores. My husband and I give them money as a lesson in responsibility and because we just feel like it, not as a rewarding system.
We feel as if chores are just that: Chores. I don't want my girls to confuse getting an allowance for chores assigned to them for earning one's keep, they're our children, being born until they reach the age of eight teen is 'keep' enough for us, they don't have to earn the right to stay here. I view chores as part of the family structure, and that shouldn't be tainted with payoffs for a 'job well done' , or punished for a 'job not done, or a job half done'. This is a responsibility issue, not a job related issue, but getting this point across to a nine year old is hard.

In all fairness, my daughter feels as if she should get paid for her chores.
What do you think? Should they get an allowance?

6 comments:

Monica Jackson said...

Ummm, I have a nine-year-old. My philosophy is that she doesn't get paid for regular chores. I don't get paid! But if she wants an allowance she has to do extra that I ask her. This changes weekly, but if she gives me flak or doesn't do something I've told her do it, she gets nada.

Anonymous said...

Hmmm... this is an interesting one. I don't have kids and never really thought about it but what you and Monica write makes sense -- responsiblity vs. job related issue. I guess it depends on the parents' goals....

Paz

ME said...

Thanks Monica, you have given me food for thought.

ME said...

Thanks for the info. Hermajesty, I feel confident in what I'm doing.

Anonymous said...

Ms Mimi said....

There is a gospel song by Shirley Caesar called "No Charge" It tells the story of a young boy (about nine or ten) who makes a list about all the things his Mother asked him to do. He list raking the yard, taking out the trash, keeping his room clean, etc. He gives the list to his mother and then she tells him "she carried him for nine months, walk the floor with him when he was sick, taught him about being a good person and in the end she says "NO Charge" In the end he got the jest of what she was saying. Let your children know that rewards are earned, like respect and what they do, and what you do such as (cleaning, cooking and taking great care of them) is "NO Charge"

ME said...

Thanks Ms. Mimi, I do remember that song and it is so perternant to this topic.